So, as I look forward to marriage and babies, I have been reading, listening to talk shows and so on as the topic on parenting and how children need time from their parents more than anything is discussed. Consider the story below:
SON: "Daddy, may I ask you a question?"
DAD: "Yeah sure, what is it?"
SON: "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?"
DAD: "That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?"
SON: "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"
DAD: "If you must know, I make $100 an hour."
SON: "Oh! (With his head down).
SON: "Daddy, may I please borrow $50?"
The father was furious.
DAD: "If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work hard everyday for such this childish behavior."
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $ 50 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
DAD: "Are you asleep, son?"
SON: "No daddy, I'm awake".
DAD: "I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier. It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $50 you asked for."
The little boy sat straight up, smiling.
SON: "Oh, thank you daddy!"
Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.
DAD: "Why do you want more money if you already have some?"
SON: "Because I didn't have enough, but now I do.
"Daddy, I have $100 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you."
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.
What's funny is that I don't remember needing time from my parents as much as I needed money :-) Now, that was my national crisis. I think I had even come to believe that a place in heaven could possibly be got if only one had money! I mean, there was not a thing you asked dad for that he did not dismiss with, 'there's no money for that!'
So, maybe my siblings and I got 'overfed' with time :-)
Anyhow, in the end, I am glad I was fed more with time than with money because time meant some life values were passed on which contributed to the admirable (tongue in cheek :-)) character that I am today. A thing, I believe, all the money in the world would not have achieved. The wisest mortal to ever walk the earth once said; 'Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.' (Proverbs 22:6). Training is never a walk in the park. Neither for the trainer nor for the trainee. But it always yields some sort of result whether it is a bomber or a doctor. Time, train...you notice how they rhyme? :-)
So, moms and dads reading this, how much time did you spend with your child(ren) last week? yesterday? If you have to go further than that in memory to remember, that's cause for pause. Take a minute.
And then, there's my 'sister' Lupita Nyong'o. That black beauty of Kenyan origin who acts 'Patsey' in the movie 12 years a Slave. The world has raved about this woman until I am shaking my head.
See, I agree that she is beautiful, she is talented and it's no mean feat to shoot to world fame in your very first movie; but, eh! the hype!
I hope she can milk this Lupitrain season of all the benefits it may have to offer her because if we know anything about Hollywood/ the world of the famous, as quickly as they put you on a pedestal, is often as quickly as they chew you and spit you out. It is usually, only, strong character that can keep you sane; even alive in that jungle.
For that matter, I hope Lupita's parents made some serious t.i.m.e investment in her life :-)
In the meantime, I say, you go gal! In a few short months I will be Kenyan too and my pride will come closer to home, so to speak :-)- for now, I am proud of you as an East African; an African...this is one of the ways I pictured my dreams of Africa's recognition on the world map coming true :-) Africa is not a country! :-)
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