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Showing posts from April, 2012

Of Boys and a Belated (April) 28th Day Entry...

Bad Boys ain't no good; Good Boys ain't no fun-mbu!... Who is a Bad Boy? wakina Mr. Wrong? And who is a Good Boy? wakina Mr. Right? Mary J. Blige claims she and Mr. Wrong get along so good, they have a special thing going on. What makes a man wrong? is it his bad habits (drinking, stealing, smoking, drugs, et cetera), the clothes he wears, how many women he has slept with, how many children he has out of wedlock, his joblessness, a suspect family history, his reluctance to 'put a ring on it'??? In turn, what makes a man right? his impeccable manners, a stylish wardrobe, an absence of bad habits, perfect family roots, his virginity (or at worst only 2 or 3 sexual encounters), his lack of 'illegitimate children', a good job, his willingness to 'put a ring on it'??? As I advance, rather swiftly, towards the big 3-0, I discover that the categorization of men as bad or good, wrong or right is not the critical thing. The most important thing, inste

A PUBLIC TOAST TO LLM :-) by Lynn Kyampaire Turyatemba on Thursday, May 19, 2011 at 1:39pm

My dear little sister, I write to you, with my heart full of pride, from across the seas in the week of your victory in this 'war of the undergraduate' that has been 'raging' in your life since 2007. You have made it! God is Ebenezer in this moment... I am amazed at the woman you have grown into, far from home, buffeted on every side by life's challenges...you have become strong, wise, astute, tender, intelligent, honest, God fearing, respectful of people, tolerant, beautiful...and I couldn't be more thankful to God. After Sunday, you are a graduate...that title/ accolade may mean many things to many people....I hope that to you, it will mean that you are beginning a journey of more open-mindedness, of more vulnerability, of more willingness to grow, of greater readiness to take every opportunity by its horns... I hope and pray for these things for you because this far that the Lord has brought me, I have learnt that life is for the living and it is of

For John by Lynn Kyampaire Turyatemba on Friday, February 20, 2009 at 6:36pm

I mentioned this in my note earlier, think I should upload this...for memorial's sake... A Eulogy for John (21st November 2008) Good morning friends, Today, we gather to pay our last respects to our comrade John Jook Akuach To see such a huge congregation is a comfort and encouragement. I thank you all for making time to come. For me, it has been five days of sadness, questions and even anger… Anger, because of the awareness that the continent of Africa, even the world…has been cheated of a fine young man. A man; with dreams, potential, prospects…and the kind of determination and commitment that would have enabled him to achieve every dream and meet every target. Nevertheless; I find solace in the belief that it is not the length of the life that matters but the depth…and those who knew John, I believe, can testify that he indeed lived his life deeply. I will be the first to admit that writing a eulogy for John was not easy…because, how do you do justice to the characte

The Nationality Bug by Lynn Kyampaire Turyatemba on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 at 8:50am

 Aluta Continua! Viva Uganda!!!! (Loosely translated as, tujya kumalako!!!) Sometimes, I want to be an American, in the land of the free, then I could own a gun and it would be perfectly alright…. Other times, I want to be an Indian, then I could cook superbly and having been born frugal, save shilling by shilling and one day be a millionaire… Then, I want to be a Kenyan so I could be aggressive and loud and my nationality would be enough to explain it away On random days I want to be a Saudi Arabian, then, despite having to deal with sharing my husband with three other women, I would bask in oil riches untold There are days I wish I was Swiss and all that rich chocolate they’re famous for was available to me cheaply at the little corner store near my home… Then, when the boda boda guy almost kills me riding like a mad man and making me ‘eat dust’, I wish I was German and a nice air conditioned car was accessible to me at a pittance compared to what I have to pay for one i

those bu things....by Lynn Kyampaire Turyatemba on Sunday, February 8, 2009 at 7:39pm

1. Is my position in the 'sibling tree' at home:-) 2. Is the number of times I think through every decision I make. 3. Is the day on which I was born in September many years ago:-) 4. 4 is the number of siblings I have.laura, liza, rodney, jeremiah. 5. My intuition is 98% of the time, right on the mark! 6. I LOOOOVVVEEE MUSIC...every song I know brings back to me SPECIFIC memories, sad or joyful. 7. I love people, I think every single human being is IMPORTANT...even the ones I don't like or agree with. 8. I think dance is one of the deepest expressions of feeling, would love to marry a man with whom I can dance!... 9. 2009 is the year of LYNN!!! :-)...c.f. the Chinese calendar:-) 10. If I can laugh with you, I can trust you... 11. I still pee on my bed when am SUPER stressed...this last happened 6 months ago! 12. I miss my Mary Stuart room D16...alot of my growth happened in that room:-) 13. I think a kiss is more intimate than sex. 14. My friend Emmanuel and I still sing s

A Tribute to Frank Odoi

Frank in his younger days He was 64 years old. He was a world acclaimed cartoonist and author of the comic book, Akokhan. He was born a Ghanian but had become an 'African'- fitting comfortably in whichever country he moved to/ worked in. He died on Saturday 21st April in Nairobi-Kenya, on Jogoo road; in one of East Africa's most notorious transport means, the matatu... His body was only discovered on Monday 23rd  :-( I only got really interested in him and the work he did, ironically, on the day he died, Saturday. On Saturday morning I picked up the Michela Wrong book, 'It's our turn to Eat' and was so intrigued by her depiction of every character that I was googling each one, trying to get to know them as I devoured the book's contents. He shared a last name with a brother-in-law whose intelligence and political astuteness I have always held in high esteem and I was thinking to myself that, perhaps, there is indeed something to be said about th

My Brother: Jeremiah

His name means, God Exalts. His forehead is marked with a cross shaped scar. He wears spectacles. He is 19 going on 30 :-) He is the last born. He is wise beyond his years; philosophical even. He is a natural gentleman. He loves Jesus. He can always be counted on to make me smile :-)- a testimony to his optimism in all things. He can fix ANYTHING electrical; evidence of his experimental nature. He first drove a car when he was 8 years old (he is daring like that!) He will choose Nile Special or Tusker Malt , depending on his mood. He had a 'long hair keeping' phase that almost drove mom mad :-) He loves to dance. He is an excellent actor. His eye's apple is a damsel named Sheila :-) He weighs....kg (I can't reveal this, coz he wishes he was heavier)  :-) He has a quick temper :-( He is the only person I know who likes to eat posho and beans! He has the nicest hands and feet in our home exactly like our late Dad's. He wants to retire at 30; whi

Wondering About Me

 forget Demarco and his loving life declaration:-(  Grey :-( I am not ovulating, so that is removed as a reason for this forlornness I feel/ have been feeling lately. It's been cold and dreary lately, yes, but even that doesn't quite cut it as a reason for my feeling like this...arrgghhh! Anyway, it probably has to do with hope deferred. The Good Book in Proverbs asserts that that situation can make the heart sick. Yeah, gorrit...my heart is sick :-( Meanwhile, that picture on the left actually cracked me up :-) Who does that???, 'dude, do you think you are a rocket, oba?' Scents & Bums :-) In other news, a friend gave me a gift, the other day, of the Jennifer Lopez Love & Glamour  perfume and I have to say, when it comes to scents, she does get it right :-). Way to go! to the woman with insured buttocks :-). My mom told me the other day that I have grown a sizable pair of buttocks in the last couple of years. I am still de

Inspire a Generation; The London Olympics

Haile Gebrselassie, the Ethiopian Bullet; the world marathon record holder The title of this post is the motto for this year's Summer Olympic Games scheduled to begin on 27th July 2012 in London. There are 99 days to go as of today. The Olympic Games have been happening every two years since 1896 in Athens Greece. The Games are currently held every two years, with Summer and Winter Olympic Games alternating, although they occur every four years within their respective seasonal games.Africa will be well represented with at least 46 of  the total 216 countries, who will participate, being African countries. The two African countries with the highest chance of winning many gold medals ware Ethiopia and Kenya what with their extraordinary long distance runners who seem to operate like bullets :-). Uganda's own Edward Ekiring is the world's number one badminton player so we can hope for a medal from his performance. I wish them all the best. in·spi·ra·tion /ËŒins

How Many Calories Should I be Eating? (The Harris Benedict Calculator)

Okay, so, my friend Hope and I are fast accepting that we are no longer as young as we used to be and as a result, we tend to pack on the weight more easily than we lose it. We try to do exercises here and there but mostly, since we are 'office gals', our lives are sedentary. This means that we have to watch the calories going in so that we can ensure that there are no extras that will result into fat that will gather in places :-). So, here is a formula I found on the www. I know a majority of my female friends will appreciate it. So, go on, do the much dreaded math :-) I've done mine!... The Harris Benedict Equation is a formula that will give you a better idea of your ideal caloric intake. It requires four steps. Calculate your Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR) using one of the equations below: Men (Imperial Units/United States) : BMR = 66 + ( 6.23 x weight in pounds ) + (12.7 x height in inches ) – ( 6.76 x age in years ) = ________ Men (Metric Units) : BMR = 66 + ( 1

My Sister: Liza

Let me tell you about my '20-something going on 40' year old sister. She is 5"5. She is a yellow banana :-). She wears spectacles. She loves to wear (and consequently to buy [ very often ])high heels. She sounds like a man in the morning, deep throated voice and laughter. She loves music, can sing along to most of the popular R n B 'buyimba'. She can do some pretty fascinating make-up on any face, real artistry. She is a Queen and must be treated as such (Paul is the only man who has understood this better than anyone). The hair that grows from the roots of her scalp has been the igniter of envy from femalefolk in her life since forever :-). She loves colour, do not give her greys and blacks. She can cook up a storm, give her any recipe and she will bring it to life. She drives a hard bargain, for all her lack of fluency in vernacular, she never fails to get the best deal on clothes, shoes, bags, whatever. She, unlike me, does not easily get up to

Does Porn have a place in marriage/ relationships?

Dear All & sundry, I post verbatim, below, a blog post from one of the blogs I follow. Let me know what y'all think about this issue, by posting a comment on here or on my facebook wall. Thank you. Have a lovely Thursday. A reader sent me an email this week, asking me about my views on pornography as it relates to relationships that have potential to end in marriage. “I know that you are not a counselor or any such thing. I am just asking in case you may have some insight into issues of this nature,” she wrote. She summed my credentials succinctly. I am no counselor, and certainly have not been trained in the effects or porn or how to combat addictions. I do have a little insight, however, and at her request and sharing them today. I won’t take you into M.O.M mode for this one. If we took an imaginary trip into the porn world it would just end badly for all of us. So your man is sitting in the closet with his pants down watching other people get off, eh? It’s not ex

Laughter is the best medicine: Attention, Mr. Mugenyi

Dear Friend, Banange, nga you can make a girl laugh! I have hahad! Yesterday, I had a first good laugh with you in a very long time. Thank you :-)... I know how much you hate your picture being out there on the world wide web naye I am gonna post it here. Allow me.  A toast to you!

Thinking of You :-)

You've been on my mind... I listen to Cassandra Wilson's 'Redemption Song' rendition and I remember the early days, I watch 'Game of Thrones' and late, cozy nights and falling asleep infront of the television come to mind, I drink Gilbey's Gin and I am reminded of my first-ever drunken, emoted phone call, I go by 'Cassablanca' and I resolve once again never to go in there as I remember you appropriately calling it my designated devil's lair in Kampala city, I wear my black, peep-toe pumps and the excitement I had to show them off to you the day I bought them, washes over me again, There is this 'swishy' black skirt that reminds me of the afternoon you 'proved yourself' :-) Looking at Seven Seas MultiVitamin syrup on supermarket shelves brings tears to my eyes, a tug at my heart :-( Zone 7 's chicken wings with mashed potatoes transport me to times of satisfaction after serious hunger pangs, I read newspaper a

"If a Man Wants You"- A Reminder :-)

During the Easter weekend, the topic of 'sons and lovers' was high on the agenda for me and my girlfriends. Our riotous meeting on Good Friday left me thinking through the weekend about this oft discussed issue and I was reminded of this article, as pasted below, and how true every word therein is. I hope I can be reminded as often as I find myself  in a no-good relationship, to 'grow a vagina' and walk away instead of making excuses. I choose courage :-) IF A MAN WANTS YOU ... If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourselves for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t "be friends." A

The Chocolate Party :-)

So, as a result of a TIME magazine article, as posted verbatim below, my housemate and I decided we should have a chocolate party at our house one of these days. You know, like a bottle party, only this time, you come with a bottle of alcohol and at least 100g of chocolate :-) Who's in?!!! Holla at your gal!...Of course we hope to attract the female folk mostly, but if there are men out there unashamed to indulge in a chocolate and alcohol binge, you are welcome! :-) Sweet Revenge. Chocolate eaters are thinner. Really. By Alice Park Long branded as a dieter’s foe, chocolate may have been given an unduly bad rap. That’s what the latest study to balance the health benefits and harms of the sweet treat shows: sure, chocolate is loaded with calories, but its fattening potential may be more than offset by its positive metabolic effects- which also improve heart health, cholesterol levels, glucose control and blood pressure. In the study, involving more than 1,000 men and

I am a Catch

I have been pondering, over the last couple of days, a rumour, that I heard on the weekend has been going around, that sometime last year I was 'tying on' a certain guy; read: throwing myself at him, giving him time he did not want, stalking him...et cetera. I can't stop shaking my head when I think of these allegations and how untrue they are (especially where this particular guy is concerned). I am a catch. I am the JAVAs chocolate fudge cake recipe every chocolate cake lover wants to get a hold of. I am the Mercedes G 55 AMG every self respecting, Merc loving man in this town wants to drive. I am the Whitney Houston- type pitch control every diva wishes for. I have used three analogies and I can think of many more. Because, let's face it, I- am- more. As I grow older, I begin to acknowledge (more like accept) that I am a pretty unique/ special person. This acknowledgement does not mean I think more highly of myself than I ought